Strut it Girl ... You Know How to Use it!!!

Somebody needs to explain to me what all the noise is regarding the beautifully body painted skin of La Toya Woods, our representative to the Miss Universe 2010 contest.

Pardon me but I find it a tad difficult if not down right impossible to take all of this noise and hoorah seriously, particularly from a country that has two nationally sanctioned days of ‘Bare Naked Ladies’ – well almost – on display on an annual basis!

This tin whistle noise about Ms Woods’ supposed nakedness goes beyond me. When I first heard the furor, I was led to believe that our queen took it upon herself to get up close and personal with a paint artist and a photographer in order to ‘make a point’. After taking the time to do my own research, I have learnt that the photograph was SANCTIONED by Universe International, and in fact formed a part of La Toya’s Universe portfolio of OFFICIAL photos … as did the photographs of ALL OF THE CONTESTANTS … AS THE PHOTOGRAPHS WERE ORDERED UP BY THE FRANCHISE HOLDERS – and I mean the INTERNATIONAL FRANCHISE HOLDER HIMSELF!

Heads up peeps! She didn’t have a choice, and seriously, even if she did have a choice, bravo for her, because she knew how to use the assets that were given to her at birth.

The photo is tastefully done … the woman is wearing pasties … and her skin tone just screams for art!

To all of the supposed Trini purists who are gasping and clutching their chests and up in arms against it … SHUT UP! You are the same ones who walk through Port of Spain on Carnival Monday and Tuesday with your cameras and video cams, all in the name of ‘recording the spectacle for posterity’, and then on Ash Wednesday you email all of those pics to your horny-ass buddies … trust me, I know what I speak of. You’re the same bunch of ingrates – and I speak here of the men – who yell at your daughters for their teeny weeny costumes, but lust after their girlfriends who are wearing the SAME costume! Not nice…

Get a grip people and give the girl your support – she needs it. Be proud of the fact that there’s a Trinidadian woman out there who makes body paint look good – and I don’t mean the minuscule muscle woman who does it every Carnival Tuesday in her husband’s band for camera time and effect – I mean the one who is waving our flag high in Las Vegas, and trying to reclaim our pageant glory.

As a size-sexy woman, I WISH I had the guts to do it, but uhm … one step at a time okay???!

For Dan ...

A star of friendship
That glittered just out
Of my periphery
But not for long
Boldly you strode
Into my line of fire
And you gave just as
Good as you got
Matching me word for word
Joke for joke
Put down for put down

A wicked little sprite
With shining eyes
And a bag of naughty pixie dust
That’s what you are
You slipped in thru my laughter
And left tiny, muddy footprints
On my heart…

And now … just when
I’ve grown accustomed to your presence
You’re going to disappear from me
Taking your laughter with you
Leaving me bereft
Of your antics
And longing for sparkling
Pixie dust and white toothed smiles
Often imagined but not seen

I will miss you
My muffin man
I will miss you
My mischievous Prince
Though it lasted
But a Cosmic hour
I will forever cherish
The budding of our
Friendship flower
And anticipate the day
When we truly meet
Face to face
And heart to heart

Be well, be happy
Be free, be loved

Farewell …

Doing PENance in The Food Aisle ... HI Prices, LO Quality

I’ve been a loyal, card-carrying member of the Hi Lo Food Stores for as long as I can remember. It wasn’t just about the points and the prizes … I have been in Hi Lo’s corner since before the days of ‘FOLLOW DE RED ARROW AT HI LO’

There was a time … not so very long ago … when I boasted to all who would listen about the fact that their prices were better than Tru Valu’s and that the shelves were stacked better than many of the other markets.



Well…

The thrill is gone.

I went to Hi Lo Four Roads a couple Saturdays ago, in search of ingredients for a couple cakes that I had to build for an order. I looked at the baking shelf in sheer horror. The prices were between $5 and $8 more than those at Tru Valu. I even mentioned this to two members of staff who were on the lane. One of them shrugged her shoulders and said to me that members of staff had spoken to store managers about the recent pricing and that nothing was being done.

That’s when I remembered my mother’s annoyance when a couple months ago she spent over eight hundred dollars at the West Moorings branch and she had no idea what she had purchased. Faithful customer that I am, I still continued to think of the two situations as a fluke.

This Sunday morning, however, when in a state of bewilderment I walked out of the Four Roads branch with approximately three large bags, having just spent slightly under four hundred dollars, brotha the bloom was so off of that rose.

What the hell is going on with the Canning’s Group of Companies – the parent company of Hi Lo Food Stores??? Is it that the WANT to be priced out of the market? Could it be that they are searching for such exclusivity that pretty soon their own staff won’t be able to spend there?

This is ridiculous!!! There is no need to pay the exorbitant costs for vegetables when Canning’s has their own farms – something I might add, that they have boasted about in the past. How can it be that a couple blocks up the Diego Martin Main Road at West Bee’s it is possible to purchase 6 cartons of Green Butterfly Evaporated Milk for the special price of $30 and that special is not available at Hi Lo … in fact I believe that the cost of evaporated milk has soared to almost $6 a carton. Have I mentioned that we’re talking quarter litre cartons here?

How is it that three packets of macaroni can be had at West Bees for $10 dollars but not at Hi Lo? Whatever happened to specials???

You have dubbed yourself the nation’s favorite food store. Guess what? That shit no longer holds water. Have you not noticed that the month end lines have dwindled? Try doing a little sneak shopping at Tru Valu on a month end Friday and see the lines wrapping around lanes like ‘back in the day’ at Hi Lo. And it’s not just on a month end anymore. You can find those long lines on any given day. The transition is almost complete and in a little while from now Hi Lo will be a thing of the past, and that would be so sad.

What makes it even scarier is the fact that the budget has not as yet been read for the upcoming fiscal year and as such I shudder to think what the near future holds for food prices across the board.

Something has to be done, because points and prizes are no longer enough to hold on to your customers Hi Lo … better can and MUST be done.

Go back to the days of comparison shopping – when replenishing staff would go to other markets and compare so that the prices were better controlled.

Have a heart for your fellow citizens – those whose salaries have not been increased, even though their food costs have. Do the math and attempt, as the other members of the Supermarket Owners Association have, to find the middle ground.

Don’t make me come get yo ass!!!

Fix this and NOW!!!

Reasoning ...

Give me one good reason
Why I shouldn’t let you
Have your way …
Just leave you to celebrate
And fete your self pity
Tell me why I should
Bother to care enough
To want you to snap
The hell out of this
Foul funk
The stench of which
Is evident for miles around…
Has it occurred to you
In the midst of your wallow
That you are hurting me
When you hurt yourself?
Explain it to me…
Make me understand…
Help me make sense of
Your need to hurt yourself
Your yen for constantly wandering
Back to the people, places and things
That you intrinsically know
Will bring you pain…
Why do you believe yourself
To be so unworthy of the
Beauty that awaits you?
You are worthy –
You deserve the good
In this world, just as I do
You deserve me
As I deserve you
We deserve the love
The trust, the commitment
The happiness…
The Life that sits and
Waits in Limbo while you
Decide in a vacuum about
Your worthiness
Do you honesty believe
That I would waste
All that I was born to give
On a man unworthy
Of my treasure?
If it be so in your mind
You must not think much of yourself
And even less about me
And that right there is a shame!
Climb out of the hole
That you’ve dug yourself
And rejoin the rest of the living
Give yourself the chance
To love and to be loved in
The way that you deserve
The way that only I can love you
In just the same way that
I was destined to love you
Fighting has its place
And when done right it’s a wonder!
So darling if fight you must
Then fight --- but just
Remember to fight with all
You have in you
For us and not against us…

Common Sense SusPENded...

I sat and watched in horror as the supposed strong arm supporters of the People’s National Movement (PNM) stood in judgement of the former Prime Minister, Mr Patrick Manning. It was not a pretty sight. They jeered, and glared and some of them even spat at him. They hurled insults at the man … but then, having all those years ago done the same to The Christ, why not a mere mortal like Mr Manning?

Comparisons have never been my strong suit, but having said same, I can’t help but look back at the way that Mr Basdeo Panday, former leader and Founder of the United National Congress, was allowed to demit office – practically in silence.

Is it that we on the ‘red’ side of the fence are a ‘tad’ more passionate in our politics? I hardly think so. What exactly was the gain in making a mockery of Manning? Do you feel better? How hypocritical of all of you, since you were the SAME people who not a good 48 hours before were hailing him as your ‘forever commander-in-chief’.

Question: did those of you who turned up at Balisier House to throw stones and assassinate Manning’s character, even VOTE on Election Day? Did you do more than wear a Red Party T-Shirt and wave a poster? Did you talk to your friends and family about doing their civic duty and exercising their personal franchise?

In your haste to jeer and spit nasty and unnecessary words at Mr Manning, did you even remember what he did to get you and this country to where we are today? Do you know what a compliment it is for Trinidad and Tobago to be referred to as the Miami of the Caribbean? Did you stop to remember that we all have our momentary lapses of reason, and although he did seem to have one that lasted a couple of years there, like us, the former PM, is HUMAN???

What a shame it was for me, a true blue (okay red, smiling) supporter of the PNM, to sit and watch in utter shame and confusion as some of us turned on our very own. The final embarrassment came with the arrival of the Riot Squad. Imagine Mr Manning needing the Riot squad to escort him to safety from the hands of HIS OWN PEOPLE and in front of PARTY HEADQUARTERS???!

EPYCK PHALE!

To say that I am sorely disappointed in the members of the PNM who partook in that debauchery does not even begin to cover it.

While I take the time at this point to heartily congratulate the new Leader of the Opposition, The Hon. Dr. Keith Rowley, and pledge my support to his cause and all that he plans to achieve, I earnestly pray that his supporters had nothing to do with this, and if any of them did, all I have to say to them is BETTER THAN THAT!

Please know that I will call out whoever is at fault … be ye SOP, UNC, PEOPLE’S PARTNERSHIP or PNM. The Pen takes no prisoners ~ whoever you are.

We pause till once again awakened by the insipid behaviour of we the Human Race…

Well, Look at What HapPENed ...

“What a scent, what a scent, what a scent … the smell of the summer of our discontent…” David Rudder, The Savagery.

I suppose the thing to say today is that the writing is on the wall and that the people have spoken.

That would be the thing to say, but I am still unable to say it. I can’t say it because there are things that I have been privy to in the last few days that have left the stench of desperation and degradation clinging to my clothing.

The naive amongst us continue to parrot the words that “this election was not about race but about change.” The sad thing is that even though it was PROVEN – via print and electronic media that it was indeed about race, and not in a good way, the persisted.

I could go on here to quote chapter and verse, but at this time, the point is mute.

What I will say is that I sincerely hope that the new PM … and by that I mean PUPPET MASTER … remembers:

- That they have to deliver on every single campaign promise
- That the promised pay cut will be THEIRS and not that of the civil servants who blindly followed them down the yellow brick road
- That Trinidad and Tobago has an positive international presence – one that has been fought for, reconstructed after the former UNC regime and won back
- That although it is in their inner sanctum the time for ‘them’ to rise, that they need to remember that ALL SORTS OF PEOPLE put their misguided trust in them, therefore they would need to look after EVERYBODY’S welfare

On the other hand, I sincerely hope that the ones who blithely followed the Pied Piper down this particular road of ‘RISING’ would remain watchful and remember the following:

- That they promised an increase in old age pensions, nevermind the detrimental cost to the country
- That your children will soon no longer have the benefit of free tertiary education, so you had better have your ‘dollars’ put aside for the dollar for dollar tertiary level plan
- That the free lunches for elementary level students will soon become a thing of the past
- That your CDAP is about to go bye-bye
- That you have now ushered in the possibility of legal abortions in a country that has NEVER considered such

My grandmother and other elders had one word that they would repeat whenever we of the younger generation would do something that was doomed to cause us pain and failure. They would look us in the eye and say “Tanto, Tanto” while shaking their heads from side to side. Basically they were telling us that all we had to do was sit back and wait for the consequences of our insipid actions. So, I say it now to you … Tanto, Tanto; and if you still don’t get it, then, Bam-bye … me go tell yuh.

In the end I will continue to say God bless our Nation, and I will pray and invite you to pray for peace, common sense, patience, foresight and hindsight, particularly hindsight, since rumour has it that it is perfect 20/20 vision.

The pen rests here … trust though that she will indeed be back…

Let's Have An oPEN Discussion...

It’s the pen again. I’ve been soaking up the silliness and attempting to distill it down to its true essence … take the baffle out of the bullshit as it were.

So here we go…

TELL ME WHAT YOUR NAME REALLY IS.

I’ve heard people scoff when the ruling party says that they are the ONLY REAL POLITICAL PARTY IN TRINIDAD AND TOBAGO. Ya know what? They ain’t lying. The People’s National Movement – PNM – was born in 1956 with that name … has NEVER changed its name and today in 2010 it is still called PNM. That’s the mark of consistency and perseverance.

So let’s talk about the 5-headed monster:-

UNC: United National Congress … was born United Labor Front/ULF, became the NAR – National Alliance for Reconstruction … then there was the split that saw the birth of Club 88, which morphed into UNC and now we have UNCOP – the unholy alliance of The UNC and the COP – Congress of the People.

COP: Congress of the People. Okay … this is the ‘sour grapes’ entity formed by the grey-headed, bobble-necked weakling when he exited the UNC. They have just had their first name change – see above.

NJAC: The National Joint Action Committee – the lovechild of a bitter black man who seems to be unable to come to terms with the fact that he is indeed free, and there hasn’t been a colonial ‘massa’ after him for centuries now. This is the stomping ground of a man who is so afraid of anything that is not black that he willingly desecrated the Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception during the now infamous Black Power Uprising of the 70s, and is YET to apologize.

TOP: Tobago Organization of the People – a bitter stepchild of the now practically defunct NAR.

So you put all of this together and you get UNCOP or The People’s Partnership. Riiiiight.

Riddle me this then … if it is then that the People’s Partnership is UNITED in its attempts to remove the party in power, please explain the need for the 5 heads of this monster to run under their own symbols. Were it a united front – ‘front’ being the operative word – why not one representative symbol? This again brings the question – should this united house that is already divided somehow pull off a victory on May 24th, WHO IS GOING TO LEAD??!

WHO ARE YOU? WHAT IS YOUR NAME AND WHO IS YOUR LEADER??

MANIFESTATIONS OF CHILDISHNESS

Pipe Queen, oh Pipe Queen. Please tell me what you have accomplished by ripping the PNM’s manifesto to shreds on a public platform, save appearing as that of a small, petulant child? Did you get a power rush when you did that? The irony is that some of the very same programs that you once scoffed at and now declare agreement with are ensconced, as they well should be, in that very document you shredded. Is it that you hate the fact that the ruling party actually know what they are talking about and have been talking about for years? You seem a little (and I’m being polite here) CONFLICTED. Pick a side, stick with it.

SOME PEOPLE COULD EAT VOMIT BOY!!

Subhas Panday! Epic Fail – ‘NUFF SAID!

UDECOTT – THE ‘HART’ OF THE MATTER

Seriously this represents the flogging of a dead horse by both sides. UNCOP – find something REAL to complain about. The mistakes made have been brought to the fore and admitted to – move on. Members of the party, let the jackasses bray and cease from responding to them – move on.

VOLNEY – REALLY? SERIOUSLY??

This supposed paragon of truth and justice ... in actuality, this toothless bulldog; with his hyena pitched voice and screeching deliveries on platforms – what purpose does he serve? As one of the people formerly sworn to uphold the law and its secrets – you have openly discussed the inner workings of certain cases – EPIC FAIL. Didn’t you realize that by opening that particular can of worms that you were holding yourself up to public scrutiny? Didn’t you know that people would begin analyzing the decisions that you made? Are you aware that everyone knows that the only reasons you gave up your position as Judge were 1) You were under investigation and the walls were closing in and FAST; and 2) You have been promised the job of Attorney General? Yeah … we see you and through you.

PICCADILLY GREENS DEBACLE

Imagine my utter horror when the Pipe Queen declared the other evening that the GOVERNMNT has kept the people of Laventille uneducated and unemployed. The horror didn’t really come from the statement as much as it did from the response of the people gathered. They APPLAUDED AND AGREED! How the could really be that insipid is beyond me. These are the people – the same people – who are the recipients of the FIRST neighborhood technical institute – the Laventille Technical Institute. Have hey made use of it? No. Do they make use of the myriad of programs available which foster the betterment of lifestyles and living conditions via educational and work relief? No. Is it that they are prepared to live by the words “I vote fuh dem so dem hadda mine meh till ah dead’? Yes. We ALL have to work for what we have. There are no free rides. We pay in many ways for the lifestyles that we are enjoying, be it cash, kind or whatever else is needed. The people of Laventille have been, and continue to be there own worse enemy, what, with the whole ‘PICK UP YUH BUS PASS AN’ WAIT’ mentality; and until they awake from their drug induced slumber and clear their heads and hearts, that is where they will stay – no matter WHO is in the Executive Office. Only then will they see that be remaining in their present haze, they remain expendable, killable, replaceable grease for the demonic grindstones of drugs, guns and murder.

RING DE BELL, RING DE BELL

Right --- the ox-like moron yet again! Be careful what you wish for Pipe Queen because you just might get it. You are spoiling for a Spiritual bitch-slapping from messing with the icons of the Spiritual Baptist faith. This baldheaded one – this “woman” that you have put so much stock and faith in – is messing with things that she ought to know better of. Ringing a bell as a Spiritual Baptist calls forth entities and forces that you shouldn’t necessarily be awakening. You have declared yourself to be a Baptist-Hindu. Know that the two realms do not usually mix. Note that although deities from one faith do appear in the other, like oil and water, there is no love lost between them. This person is making a mockery of what is supposed to be held in sacred regard. I have NEVER seen a Hindu appear on ANY political platform to perform a Poojah – have you? So why the need for the Baptist exhibition? Is this your pathetic attempt to reach out to the afro-based dynamic? Better than that!

As usual, there are more questions than answers, but the Pen pauses here … she will be back anon.