STOLEN...

He’s not mine, I’m not his …
Yet the magnetic pull
Between us boggles the mind.
We make no sense
Outside of stolen moments
When hands grope for places
And things oft talked about
When clothing feels like prisons
When eye contact speaks volumes
And a touch transmits the sexual electricity
Between us – the current that shouldn’t be
Whispers of words that
Translate willingly into “Fuck me please”.
The scent of each other’s skin
The sound of our voices
The glimpse into each other’s thoughts
Thoughts consumed by the possibility
Of further stolen moments
When we consummate this mind blinding need
To sweetly fuck till the need subsides,
But it doesn’t…
To touch and to taste till there’s nothing new,
But yet there is …
There will always be a yen for
Stolen moments
Secret times, illicit sweetness
Blind release, and naughty, naughty musings…

THREE LITTLE WORDS...

Yeah I know you were expecting “I love you”, but I have come across three words that pertain to me --- and right now they hold more power.

You see … these words are very much alike yet they are extremely different –

DEER, DEAR, DARE…

Confused much? Don’t be …

DEER

I’ve been, I sadly confess, a deer caught in headlights – waiting to be rescued by someone who would tell me that I didn’t need to say anything … that they understood and heard what was in my heart. I’ve stood in those headlights, longing for the arrival of my supposed Knight in shining armour, who would step out from behind those bright as hell headlights and scoop me up into his strong and competent arms from the path of the oncoming ‘chariot’ and save me from all impending danger. Unfortunately it never happened … the knight didn’t arrive, at least not in time – and invariably I was left to languish under the bus, wallowing in unrequited love, hurt, disappointment, anger and sadness. The ones that I kept near and dear before didn’t hold me in such high esteem. They preferred what they preferred and usually it was someone who they declared to be toxic and unworthy of their love and my worry. The truth is that they declared this so many times that their speeches usually ended up being read by the Universe as declarations of love and passion.

Having seen the cold hard light of dawn, I would be the one to detach and free them to languish in their self imposed toxicity while I licked my wounds … silently – yet again – wondering why it is they couldn’t see what I couldn’t say … all because no one held me …

DEAR

Oh to be dear to someone … that’s really all I’ve wanted – to be held in high and precious regard … to be the one whom others are willing to tilt at windmills for, and to feel moved to do the same.

To be dear is to be precious … to be thought of as special, worth fighting for, even if it means fighting with self. Holding someone dear makes us dear ourselves. Just as our dear ones glow, so do we … as they smile, so do we … it’s a wonderfully symbiotic relationship. Being held dear allows us permission to …

DARE

Dare to be different … dare to step out of the headlights … dare to speak out and into your own life. We dare to say all of the things that we’ve been storing up inside while we stood in those infamous headlights. We dare to be true to self and to the ones we hold dear. Finally we get to the point where nothing short of a watershed moment would give life to all that we have wanted so desperately to speak into being … to give life to.

So basically …
I was a deer until someone held me dear and as a result I now dare to be all the things that others believed that I could be – even when I didn’t – and all the things that I knew were locked deep inside but didn’t dare be.

I am changing, journey with me … I am a work in progress, but what progress I have made … all because I have now taken the time to dare …

Today I dare to fall through my fears because unless I do, I will never know what waits for me, and I will never sprout the appropriate wings that I will need for this flight…

To The One Who Holds My Heart ...

I love you.

I love you now like I’ve loved you for lifetimes past and yet to come.

I loved you when you were my father and I loved you when our roles were reversed and I was your husband…

There have been so many love stories between us, so many joys … so many tears, and yet we are drawn to each other lifetime after lifetime - like rainbows to the sky after the storm has passed.

I love you.

I love you even when you infuriate me wit your standoffish behaviour. I love you when you work my last nerve with your wisecracks one day and your silence on the next.

My love for you has given you the control over my personal weather patterns – you bring me my joy … can be responsible for my pain and are the catalyst for my silent contemplations. Your love for me makes me easier to be around, happier than I have been and freer to love you more.

I love you.

That’s all there is to this, and that’s all there needs to be to this…

You are my heart … you have my heart…

Always in All Ways,

Me…

We Build ...

We build our dreams apart from each other
In the hopes that they will align
When we come together
We build our lives being sure to make room
In our constant evolution
For the ones who hold our hearts
We build our hopes on rainbows
That bridge the distance between
Our reality and our intent
Our truths are constructed
From the innuendo that springs
Out of the contact we have
With our perspective partners
With the people we meet and
Dare to dream that they
Would agree to be our friends
We spend our lives building
Those erector sets presented to
Us at birth – gifts from the fates
The fates being the same ones
Who delight in sometimes reeking havoc
And throwing lightening bolts at us
Knocking our tentative efforts
To the ground
We build constantly –
Our hopes, dreams, truths and aspirations
We may not always know the ultimate destination
But our search for happiness drives us
Yet further to build and build and build
We do so at a frenzied pace
Anxious to get to the point
Where we can say “That’ll do” …
But are we ever really sated
Or do we stop when we belive
We have accomplished what was fated
We build each other up
And break each other down
We build for hope and glory
We build for love and comfort
We build with each other … we build for each other
We dream and we build and we search until
We come upon the one…
That one who we were searching for
The ‘You’ in our ‘You and Me’ … the ‘Them’ in our ‘We’
The one who causes us to build in
The hope of finding the missing brick
The lost puzzle piece
The one who holds our balance
The music to our dance
The dance we dance as we build our
Castles in the Air…

Astral Connections...

In that wonderful place between slumber and consciousness

In that magical midnight witching hour

Your spirit finds mine and awakens me

To the wondrous delight of your astral ministrations

With fervor and heat and an urgency sweet

You arouse the dormant needs that flow through me

The want that inflames me the desire that moves me

And you feed me with the good, sweet

And intoxicating things that only your aura brings

You capture me with arms made of gossamer

And kiss me with lips made of mist

Everything about you feels so solid and true and strong

But you’re not really there

I am surrounded by your essence

The truest sense of your being

Yet physical vision causes your image to flee

I see you trough astral eyes

Through the vision of

A woman in love with her man

A woman at ease with going with this particular flow

One who is being made love to in the highest form of adoration

With the sweetest tenderness on that soft, silk wrapped cloud

Known as Astral Splendor

Our spirits meet … part and meet again

Our coming together a moment of mutual pleasure

In a place where time has no value

Soul to soul, yet skin to skin

We love on a plane where you penetrate

Not only my willing body but you make love to my

Ever expanding mind

My open surrender to you is matched

Only by your willing acceptance of me

And vice versa

Together we explore the many levels of astral pleasure laid out before us

Over and over and over again until our spirits can do no more

But explode into faceted crystal pieces falling gently to the earth like rain

As we disconnect from the silver cord that held us in place

As we loved the night away

In that secret place known only to you and me

On the Astral Plane …

The Story of My Life...

I’ve been trying to write my own story
But I’m finding it hard to do right now
‘Cuz I’m finding it difficult to write my story
Without your presence
I can’t remember what it was like before you
And I don’t think I want to
You have permeated every corner of my life
Your aura lingers long after you’re gone
When you’re here time flies
When you’re gone it stretches on and on

Write my life story without you?
Why would I even try
It’s clichéd I know
But you are a part of me
You are a part of my smile
You contribute to my joy
Your smile brings me laughter
And your hurt leaves me tears

Write my story without you?
I’m not even sure that
I could live my life without you
I miss you as soon as
You’re apart from me
And I anticipate your arrival
Like a child awaiting a treat
Silly, isn’t it?

I do wonder sometimes
Can you write your story without me?
Could you go a day without me?
Do you wonder about me when
I’m away from you
Does my absence leave a hole in your chest?
The way your absence leaves me bereft?

There are days when I’m given a
Peek into the window of your soul
And there are times when
I believe I can see my reflection there
And then … as swiftly as it appears
The portal is shut and I’m left again
To wonder like Alice

Whatever the reason or season
I am thankful for the footprints
That you’ve left on my heart
For the moment that you were
Gifted to me
All those lifetimes ago
And I am blessed in the knowledge
That your heart has found me
Yet again

May I suggest
That we write our stories together
One more time …

INTENTIONS ...

I had every intention
Of telling you what’s been
Floating around my heart –
The way my stomach
Double dips every time
I think about you

I had every intention
Of confessing my desire
To let my fingers
Do the walking all over
Your smooth, honey-toned body
As I explore the ridges
Hills, valleys and planes
Of your landscape

My truest intention
Was to let you know
That I desire more than
Want you, like I desire
Air and water for life
I say desire because
A want manifests a lack
And there is no lack here
Just a desire for more and more

My body intends
To warm itself in
The fire of your presence
Just as my soul
Intends to bond with yours
And find solace in the
Knowledge that we are as one

I have every intention
Of making my intentions known
I intend to bring them
To reality
‘Cuz I believe that your
Intentions match mine
So
Are you ever going to
Verbalize those intentions of yours?

Heart Ramblings Too ...

My heartstrings are tuned

To your tone now

You call to my heart

And you answer me

When I summon you

There is no need for words

Between us – not anymore –

Your beautiful mind

Harkens to mine…

My heart explodes

Like so many

Roman candles

As it comes to grips

With the pain truth

And the truth is

That I am humbled

By the depth of

Your love for me

I am blessed that

You chose to bless me

I am thankful

That we are here

In this time

In this place

Together … as we

Have been in lifetimes past

And grateful that we’ve

Found each other yet again

Through the mists of time …

So long have we

Waited to one again

Connect as one – as we …

So long have we

Searched for each other

So that we can once again

Say to each other

“I love you

those three words

have my life in them”…